Lyle the Future King of the Great Expanding Universe

This is a play I started to write several years ago. I think it was going to be a musical actually. And then instead I wrote Herbie which is in many ways the same story. KING Welcome my subjects. I’m so glad so many of you could make it. You know me as your King of the Great Expanding Universe. (Applause.) You know my daughter, the delicate yet violent and vengeful Princess Francesca. (Applause.) And my son the prince of poetry, magnets and other somewhat useless pastimes, Prince Lyle. (A few claps.) Now I’ve called you all here today, my subjects because Lyle is fast approaching the ripe old age of eighteen . . . billion and it is time that he find a wife. (murmers.) I myself have several million wives as you all know. (Laughter.) No, but seriously, only a couple million or so. So for Lyle we are just looking for one right now. Is there anyone here today who may be possibly slightly interested in marrying the future king of the ever expanding universe? VOICE OF WOMAN He’ll never be king. KING Now that’s not entirely true. I could die someday. (laughter) I could. Someone could try to kill me or I could just die of old age in a few trillion years. VOICE OF MAN You won’t die. You’ll fucking be here forever. KING Now remember, I wasn’t always king of the ever expanding universe. VOICE OF MAN But the old king’s not dead either. He’s still alive. KING Is he? VOICE OF MAN You just overthrew him. You never chopped off his head. KING Really? Is that true? Well I apologize for the oversight. We’ll get right on that. (Makes motion with his hand. ADVISOR puts on a hood, picks up an axe and walks offstage.) But that doesn’t mean I’ll be the last king. At some point like any good son of the king of the great expanding universe, I expect Lyle will kill his father. (LYLE looks dubious.) Now who wants to marry him? (Silence.) Well, someone’s got to. Come on, now people. Really. This is getting serious. (To LYLE.) What did you do to all the people in the universe? LYLE I don’t know. KING Why don’t they like you? LYLE I don’t know. KING All right, well I gotta make a proclamation. If no one agrees to marry my son by the seventh day hence, one week from today, Lyle will be beheaded in the royal expanding courtyard. (Cheers, ad lib. Yay! Yippee. Three Cheers for the King!! Long live the King!) LYLE But Dad. KING I had to kill my dad, so now I have to kill my son. The life of a King is a lonely life. Where are my wives? Send my wives to my room. I’m going to be sad. (MAN IN HOOD returns with decapitated head.) KING Ah, good. Looks like your Grampa kicked it, son. LYLE Dad! KING I have spoken. Go now in peace to serve me and one another. FRANCESCA Tough break. LYLE I am so screwed. FRANCESCA They don’t like you, huh? LYLE Guess not. FRANCESCA Have you tried a personal ad? LYLE What? Future King of Expanding Universe seeks someone special? FRANCESCA I guess not. LYLE It’s not like there are people that don’t know me. FRANCESCA You could wear a disguise. LYLE They’d figure it out at the wedding. FRANCESCA They might. LYLE I should just kill myself. FRANCESCA Don’t do that. You got a few days to try and find a wife. You may as well wait it out. We can think of something. LYLE I guess. I don’t even want to get married. FRANCESCA I didn’t either but look how happy I am. LYLE Are you happy? FRANCESCA Well, I’m married. LYLE I’m going to go to my room and weep and write some poetry. FRANCESCA This is fixable. I mean, we knew this was going to happen. You just need a P.R. machine. We’ll make you look good and then all the girls will love you. LYLE How? FRANCESCA We could publish your poetry and then when the women arrive for a book signing, you hit on them, get them back to your place, put the moves on them and then get them to agree to marry you. LYLE I don’t know. FRANCESCA Either that or you chop Dad’s head off. LYLE All right. I’ll try it. FRANCESCA Tell you what? If it doesn’t work out and you really want to kill yourself, I’ll kill myself too. It’ll be like a pact. LYLE You’d do that for me? FRANCESCA Sure. Why you wouldn’t do that for me? LYLE No, I’d do that for you. Sure. Why’d you want to kill yourself again? FRANCESCA In case you do. LYLE Oh, right. Good. Good. Good.

3 more performances

http://www.nytheatre.com/nytheatre/fr_rev2007.php?0=S&1=122

from Patrick

Interesting post from Patrick on race in the theatre and the reception
of his play "about well meaning white people."

http://writinglife3.blogspot.com/2007/08/white-guy-writing-about-race-part-i.html

SCR

photo of my cast from reading at SCR

http://www.scr.org/aboutSCR/newscript.html

John Cabrera, Jennifer Parsons, Larry Bates, Nathan Baesel and Jennifer Elise Cox in SCR's 100th NewSCRipts reading of Adam Szymkowicz' Incendiary in 2007.

another review

http://www.nytheatre.com/nytheatre/fr_rev2007.php?0=S&1=122

coming September 2nd

Reading of my play Open Minds

in Chicago

http://www.browncouchtheatre.org/index2.htm

coming nov 5

Reading of my play Herbie

at the New York Public Library for the Performing Arts

http://www.nypl.org/research/calendar/prog/lpa/pseries.cfm?id=263

a review

http://www.edgenewyork.com/index.php?ci=&ch=entertainment&sc=theatre&sc2=reviews&sc3=performance&id=7123 "Susan Gets Some Play, produced by Stage Fright Productions, is funny, perky, neurotic, witty, sarcastic, and as bubbly and overflowing with fizz as a can of soda you shook too hard."

from James

http://jamespeak.blogspot.com/2007/08/jimmys-fringe-roundup.html On Saturday, I went to see Adam Szymkowicz's latest, Susan Gets Some Play, a very funny 40-minute meta-comedy play-within-a-play about, well, actress Susan Louise O'Connor trying to find a boyfriend (or at least a romp in the hey). It's as simple as that. Although...no, it's not really as simple as that. Susan and her best friend Jay try to find Susan a boyfriend by holding auditions for an imaginary production in hopes of finding Mr. Right; or at the very least, a date or make-out session. They end up auditioning as many people as they can, including a "guest celebrity" and people from the audience. Hell, the usher even gave out raffle tickets for the chance to win a date with Susan (alas, I didn't win). Ultimately, Susan isn't wild about this duplicitous process of finding a boyfriend (in one scene, she admits to have asked Szymkowicz to write this play for her, but now she feels cheap and on display), and is even less wild about all her co-stars milking their make-out scenes with her. To quote Monty Python: It's silly. There are multiple in-jokes with this show, including references to Szymkowicz's earlier work (there's a scene deliberately mimicking the New York production of Nerve), as well as jokes on insufferably self-referential New York theatre and the ignorance non-theatre-makers have on the process of putting on a play in the city (my molars would grind when a character would refer to the auditions as "play practice," which I'm sure was intended). And oh yes, there's a cool non sequitur song and dance number to boot. That Susan Gets Some Play doesn't take itself too seriously and doesn't alienate the audience with the numerous in-jokes (most of them are either fairly inclusive or not distracting enough to be jarring) makes it work. It's incredibly slight run-time (under an hour) doesn't hurt, either. With the help of the cast Moritz von Stuelpnagel's direction, Susan Gets Some Play is thoroughly unapologetic with its simple yet whimsical premise, which is one of the main reasons why this show is so light and enjoyable. note from me: I think it's more like 48 minutes but the rest is pretty damn accurate.

Photos by George Rand

Susan Louise O'Connor podcast

http://www.nytheatrecast.com/blog1/archives/23

Just found out some exciting news that I'll tell you about soon, or
else it will surreptitiously appear in my bio and I will never speak
of it.

SGSP in the fringe is going very well, or at least the first show was
great and I can only assume it will be as good or better so I'm happy
about that. no reviews yet as far as i know. come soon. I promise
if you like to laugh you will have a good time and it's less than an
hour so you can go home early.

steve patterson on submission fees

http://backstage.blogs.com/blogstage/2007/08/a-buck-too-far.html

at barnes and noble

http://search.barnesandnoble.com/booksearch/results.asp?WRD=adam+szymkowicz&z=y&cds2Pid=9481

on the shelves

http://www.dramabookshop.com/NASApp/store/Search?s=results&initiate=yes&fromauthor=yes&author=6305734

tree o

expaining theater to your family

Great post from Qui

http://beyondabsurdity.blogspot.com/2007/08/familial-theatre-fuckup.html

Chinese couple tried to name baby "@"

http://news.yahoo.com/s/nm/oukoe_uk_china_language

Starting Sat

Get your tickets now for the Daily News and New York Sun PICK OF THE FRINGE!

Susan Gets Some Play
written by Adam Szymkowicz
directed by Moritz von Stuelpnagel

starring: Jorge Cordova, Matthew DeCapua, Danny Deferrai, Kevin R. Free, Scott Ebersold,
Susan Louise O'Connor & Travis York

stage management: Hannah Kass
sound design: Walter Trarbach
composer: Kyle Jarrow
choreography: Katie Workum

Susan and her best friend Jay hold auditions for an imaginary production in hopes of finding Mr. Right...Or at least a date...Or even a freakin kiss. Who will she pick? The Celebrity, The Nice Guy, YOU?

New School for Drama Theater
151 Bank Street, 3rd floor (between West and Washington)

Sat. 8/18 @ Noon
Sun. 8/19 @ 9:15pm
Thurs. 8/23 @ 4:45pm
Fri. 8/24 @ 9pm
Sun. 8/26 @ 1:45pm

Tickets are $15 and available at www.fringenyc.org or 212-279-4488


http://www.fringenyc.org/basic_page.asp?ltr=s

http://www.myspace.com/susangetssomeplay

Pre Press:

NY Sun: http://www.nysun.com/article/59913

"Some people just don't learn -- even after they
succeed in snazzier venues, they keep coming back to
the Fringe. . . . So too returns perennial favorite
Susan Louise O'Connor, laying bare her bad dates in
"Susan Gets Some Play" by oddball Adam Szymkowicz,
whose "Nerve" garnered early hipster buzz."

NY Daily News:
http://www.nydailynews.com/entertainment/culture/2007/08/05/2007-08-05_filling_the_stage.html

http://www.fringenyc.org/basic_page.asp?ltr=s

http://www.myspace.com/susangetssomeplay

wow Cheney in 1994--take a listen

https://pol.moveon.org/donate/cheneyvideo.html?r=2879&id=10983-5323594-T9Pjx9&t=1 So if Cheney clearly knew all along that the war would do this, why would he do it? It seems almost certain it was done purposefully without regard for American or Iraqi lives for his own political and monetary gains. It's so insane. so very insane. And now we're stuck there as he knew we would be draining money, letting our soldiers die while Halliburton rakes in the bucks. It's so very evil. Is there another word? If it is clear it would destabalize the region, why would anyone do it? Especially without a good plan?

http://mmadan.wordpress.com/

Jay Leno : It was this week in 1974 that Richard Nixon resigned the presidency after getting caught lying and violating the constitution. Remember when that kind of thing used to get you kicked out of office!

from Allison

http://theatrenotes.blogspot.com/2007/08/confession-of-sorts.html

"This process is why I don't believe that any critique - and certainly
none of mine - can ever be the last word on any work of art. It would
be the height of solipsism - and even I am not that solipsistic - to
think that I, alone of 50 or 200 or 800 other people in an auditorium,
can have the only authentic experience in the theatre. It would also
be rather dull. Any response is, rather, the beginning of another
conversation. And it's all these conversations, shimmering skeins of
them, over dinner tables, in newspapers and journals and blogs and
pubs and cafes, that make what I understand to be a living culture.
And I am very proud to be one talkative thread in the whole noisy
tapestry"

I think this sort of open ended conversation on theater is missing in
American reviewing. And I think some of the blogs here are trying to
create something like this and i applaud them. Am I wrong or does it
feel like most reviewers here are trying to be the last word on the
art they are discussing?

For some crazy reason I started reading some of the bad reviews of my
previous plays. Don't ask me why. It's amazing how many voices in
our day to day writing life say "no" and "bad" and amazing how many
people want your play to be something other than what it is. If you
listened to these people and let them in and believe everything they
say, you would implode.

Sometimes you just have to be like, fuck you. this is my play. this
is the way i want to write it. Your idea will not help it. I do not
need to know you don't like it. i do not need to know what you need a
play to be.

You can't create anything new if you are worried about pleasing people.

At the same time, there are smart people sometime who know what they
are talking about and can help you and when they speak they are maybe
not saying what you want to hear about your play, but you know they
are right and you know you should work towards the things they are
saying.

Survival in this field is all about navigating these voices. I got a
show coming up and maybe I should go back to not reading reviews
again. I know what this play is. I know its strengths and weaknesses
and I will learn everythign I need to know by sitting in the audience
and feeling their energy. Do I need to read what someone thinks of
the show? Not really. Who said that if you believe the good reviews,
you have to believe the bad reviews? I'm not sure how you can do that
when they contradict but again, i'm taking everything too literally.

if you get a chance

go see Gus Schulenburg's Riding the Bull in the fringe. I saw it and
it's pretty great.

http://www.fluxtheatre.org/

Aug 15 in Columbus, OH

A reading of my play, Pretty Theft

http://www.avltheatre.com/Shows/nwn.html

on saturday

http://www.myspace.com/susangetssomeplay

Rudy Guiliani, Urban Legend

http://www.rudy-urbanlegend.com/

h/t jason

http://jasongrote.blogspot.com/

The problem that NY Firefighters have with Guiliani's leadership and
his platform which rests on the ashes of September 11.

"Paid for and authorized by the International Association of
Firefighters Interested in Registration and Education Political Action
Committee (www.iaff.org)
and not authorized by any candidate or candidate's committee."

the preview scene performed by Kevin and Susan

http://www.indietheater.org/blog/

buy my plays at barnes and noble

http://search.barnesandnoble.com/booksearch/results.asp?WRD=adam+szymkowicz&z=y