How theatre should be

This is from my fellow playwright and pal, Larry Kunofsky

PLAYWRIGHTS IN BIZZARRO-WORLD a dialogue from the obscure and cultually irrelevant Adam Szymkowicz and Larry Kunofsky

-Szymkowicz, dear boy, I read the first four of the six plays you've written this week and I'll produce two of them. Will read the others after my nine shows close.

-I do believe you're cracking wise again, Kunofsky, old man. Your shows will NEVER close. Just like mine. Pavers of the new theatrical rennaissance that we are. So. How goes it?

-Spielberg keeps calling about that screenplay he's begging me for. But why take the pay cut? The masses are begging for more plays.

-How tiresome! Supposedly I've been nominated by someone named "Oscar?" for some award by some academy for some film I wrote as a kind of charity thing. It was almost pro-bono, relatively speaking. I can't take time away from my work for any award unless it's another one of those Obies we keep winning.

-L.A. is bad for one's health anyway. Not that it matters, since we both have health insurance, of course.

-Oh speaking of work, wait: Let me go fill out my time sheet. Oh, wait yet again, I don't have to, since I MAKE A LIVING AS A PLAYWRIGHT hahahahaha!!! Say hello to Natalie Portman for me.

-I will. She's in the hot tub, waiting for me right now. Cheerio. l