Coming Soon

A workshop production of Pretty Theft at Juilliard (no sets, lights or costumes but probably some Juilliard dancers and definitely 7 excellently talented Juilliard students)

Directed by Moritz von Stuelpnagel

Saturday Sept. 9,1PM and 6PM Sunday Sept. 10, 2PM Monday Sept. 11, 7PM

Mark your calendars and tell all your friends.

Last night was the closing of Food for Fish but I don't have any of those pictures yet so here are some photos from the closing night of Nerve which I never posted.

Word of The Day

Misodramist (mi SOD ra mist) noun One who hates playwrights

"You can't take that critic seriously. He is a misodramist"

Finally we have a specialized word we can use to shut people up and accuse them of something at the same time. in the past we've had to resort to calling people racist or unamerican or woman-hating or uncouth or pedophiliac.

In this PC world we live in (switch to Mac, people), I believe this term will catch on like wildfire.

a small request: Will you please call up your electric company and ask to switch to green energy? It takes a minute and your children or someone else's children will thank you for it. Please. seriously. It's getting pretty hot. The glaciers are melting. Seriously.

Also only 3 days left

Last week to see Food For Fish

another scene--first draft as always

(Sound of crickets. CELISE digs while SABRINA and ADELE relax and drink beer. They are more casual, sans hardhats. There is a body, DAVID, lying nearby.) C I don’t know why I always have to do the hard work, just because I’m the strongest. Yes, I have amazing genes which give me huge bulging muscles. I have terrific endurance. I’m seemingly tireless. I’m like a machine carved out of steel and iron and set to maximum efficiency at all times but why does that mean that I have to do all the heavy work? A Keep digging. C Isn’t that deep enough? A No, no. Keep going. C That’s plenty big. It’ll fit. S No. She’s right. It’s got to be deeper. C I hate you both. S Why me? C I dunno. Cause you’re there? S Yeah I hate myself too. (takes a drink) (Pause) C So Adele, you going to tell us or what? A Do you really want to hear? C It’ll pass the time. S I mean you have to tell the story. A Alright, alright. First let me say I’m sorry or whatever. I shouldn’t have done it. Right. And now that that’s out of the way… I was provoked. I was provoked over and over and I just had enough. Last night he comes over and he goes right to the refrigerator without a hello and drinks my orange juice right from the carton. I yell at him to get a glass and so he pours it in a glass, drains the glass and then he leaves it in the sink. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve asked him not to leave the glass in the sink. S So what did you do? A I picked up the glass, smashed it on the table and used the biggest shard to slit his throat. He didn’t even see it coming. C That’s messy. A I know. Took me forever to clean up all the glass and blood. S Did he scream? A He gurgled. S Well, that’s something. C Is it deep enough now? A Let’s give it a shot. (ADELE and SABRINA pick up the body and put it in the hole.) A That should be ok. C I guess you want me to fill it in now. A Could you? C I hate you both. (CELISE begins filling in the hole)

a post from Johnna about a Steven Dietz workshop: Don't think in images. Think in motion. Poets and prose writers can see a chair in a room and write about it. They can describe the colors of the chair, the structural composition, the physical reality of it, the ideas is evokes. But a playwright's job is to look at the chair and imagine the motion around it. Who just sat in it? How many people this week? Where did it come from? Did they buy it in China on their honey moon? Is this the last chair she held the baby in? Etc. This is how you begin to see story. You don't describe objects or locations-- you try to see the motion around them. and also this line: If someone tells you something in a scene, nothing is happening in that scene. Get in late on all your stories and even on the scenes-- it is okay to begin where other writers would put the climax-- it is often preferrable to start at the climax.

future of cars

thanks to Mike Daisey for the link. The trick? The Tesla Roadster is powered by 6,831 rechargeable lithium-ion batteries -- the same cells that run a laptop computer. Range: 250 miles. Fuel efficiency: 1 to 2 cents per mile. Top speed: more than 130 mph. The first cars will be built at a factory in England and are slated to hit the market next summer. And Tesla Motors, Eberhard's company, is already gearing up for a four-door battery-powered sedan.

Last week to see Food For Fish Hope you can come.

An eye for

http://www.nytimes.com/2006/07/24/opinion/24gilbert.html?ex=1153886400&en=28cbeae781bd19fa&ei=5087%0A That’s why participants in every one of the globe’s intractable conflicts — from Ireland to the Middle East — offer the even-numberedness of their punches as grounds for exculpation. The problem with the principle of even-numberedness is that people count differently. Every action has a cause and a consequence: something that led to it and something that followed from it. But research shows that while people think of their own actions as the consequences of what came before, they think of other people’s actions as the causes of what came later.

Interesting article about converting a diesel car to run on vegetable oil. http://www.nytimes.com/2006/07/23/automobiles/23AUTO.html?ex=1153886400&en=dcb1ef123d105913&ei=5087%0A

Bush does what he wants

http://www.nytimes.com/2006/07/24/washington/24prexy.html?hp&ex=1153800000&en=6ab4fab5586755fc&ei=5094&partner=homepage Legal Group Faults Bush for Ignoring Parts of Bills By ROBERT PEAR WASHINGTON, July 23 — The American Bar Association said Sunday that President Bush was flouting the Constitution and undermining the rule of law by claiming the power to disregard selected provisions of bills that he signed. In a comprehensive report, a bipartisan 11-member panel of the bar association said Mr. Bush had used such “signing statements” far more than his predecessors, raising constitutional objections to more than 800 provisions in more than 100 laws on the ground that they infringed on his prerogatives. These broad assertions of presidential power amount to a “line-item veto” and improperly deprive Congress of the opportunity to override the veto, the panel said. In signing a statutory ban on torture and other national security laws, Mr. Bush reserved the right to disregard them.

First draft of something new

I'm not sure what this is yet but it might be the start of a new play.

(Three women in hard hats, A, C and S sit on a steel girder eating lunch from their lunch boxes. Faint sound of jackhammer.)

C What you got?

A Ham.

C You?

S Tuna.

A What about you?

C Yogurt.

S Yogurt again.

C I like yogurt. I used to like yogurt.

S (shouting down below) Hey! You! Let me see you shake that ass!

C And carrots.

S You’re making me all wet! I can barely control myself! Flex it! Flex it! Hey meatboy, where you going?

A He can’t hear you.

S Fuck.

C I hate my lunch.

(Pause)

A I have something to tell you.

S Not again.

C Seriously?

A Yeah, I’m afraid so.

S Fuck.

A Will you help me?

S What the fuck?

A I know.

C Seriously.

A I know. I know. I’m sorry.

C Are you?

A Yes. Will you help me?

S What, tonight?

A Could you?

S I guess.

A What about you?

C OK. But I’m not doing any of the heavy lifting or the digging.

S What are you going to do then?

C I could sing.

A I don’t think we should sing. Then people will know we’re out there digging and that wouldn’t be good.

C I could hum.

S She’ll dig. We both will.

a very nice blog review of Food For Fish by James Comtois of Nervous Boy fame. Thanks, James!!! http://jamespeak.blogspot.com/

In DC

the subways in DC are really nice and clean and modern. this is not true of the whole city but the subways are really nice. And the seats are padded and the floors are carpeted. and when you wait on the platform there is a sign that lets you know when the next train is coming and which train it is. But there was something else different and it took mea little bit to figure out what it was. There were no pan handlers asking me for money on the train. And I'm not sure why this is exactly. Anyone know? But let me talk about why I'm in DC. I've been rehearsing my play Pretty Theft which is being done in the Capital City Fringe starting today. It's really great to see this play on its feet and the direction and acting is really good. It's a delight to watch and I hope it keeps getting better and that they can figure out a way to do a longer run of the show. One thing I have learned this summer watching Nerve and watching Food For Fish is that it's fun to watch a play develop over a month-long run. Unfortunately, Pretty Theft has only four performances over two weeks and i'm just sad that these wonderful actors will not get to live with the play for as long. Provided they want to do that. I know that when I was an actor i was pretty much sick of a play after the first performance but perhaps that is part of why I'm not an actor anymore. But the cast is great and enthusiastic and lovely and Chris, the director is amazing with them and gave me a futon to sleep on and gave me a tour of DC and the fine subway system. So it's been a great trip. i reccomend having a play in the Capital City Fringe in case you were wondering whether or not to do that.

Off to DC

to rehearse Pretty Theft. See you the last week of July.

thanks to Jason Grote for this

http://www.tcg.org/publications/at/julyaugust06/humana.cfm

"It is strikingly evident in Six Years—and in the entire crop of this year's Humana plays—that American writers aren't just dusting off old ideas and giving them fresh varnish. Instead, they are taking real risks and reinvigorating our repertory of contemporary drama with muscular ideas and imaginative fervor. The bitter irony is that these bringers of new works are treated as if they were glassy-eyed dreamers and beggars in a house of plenty."

An article the amazing Sheila Callaghan wrote for the Brooklyn Rail about me. Thanks Sheila!!

yet another good review from the Times

http://theater2.nytimes.com/2006/07/11/theater/reviews/11fish.html

Did I mention I'm having a good summer?

Insert arresting image here

So this santa play isn't working at all at the moment and unfortunately I don't have lots of time to write anyway because of the show but I will perhaps start to write again next week while I'm rehearsing in DC. I think I need to be working on a different project than the one I'm trying to work on and I have a queue of ideas and I should wait to see what jumps to the front of the queue. And read some novels. I need to read.

How are you? I saw Nervous Boy and The Most Wonderful Love recently and I highly recommend both although I think they've both closed. How about that for helpful press?

http://www.adamszymkowicz.com

Listen to a podcast of my play Pretty Theft, playing in DC later this month. http://dctheatrereviews.com/fringe/_17_-_madcap_players_final.mp3 If you're in New York, come see Food For Fish. We had our official opening last night and it went very well. Reviews come out soon but buy your tickets now. http://www.theatermania.com/content/show.cfm/show/122580 Sorry I'm all business right now. it's just consuming me.

Come See FOOD FOR FISH

opens tomorrow

To order tickets just go to: http://www.theatermania.com/content/show.cfm/show/122580 or call 212-352-310

GOD HOLE FOR SANTA

The original 1st scene of a play I'm working on. i'm not going to use this at all because I decided we shouldn't ever hear god. but here is the rejected 1st scene followed by another scene i can't use at all.

(JULIUS sits on a beat-up couch. He stares at a television and holds a video game controller in his hand. He is playing furiously. JULIUS is dressed hipster sloppy, and it may take us a second to notice his large pointy ears, the only clue to us that he is an elf. )

(We watch JULIUS play for a while and then a booming voice interrupts.)

VOICE OF GOD JULIUS!

JULIUS (not looking up) What?

VOICE OF GOD JULIUS! This is your Lord.

JULIUS Who?

VOICE OF GOD This is God speaking. Can I get your undivided attention?

JULIUS (Putting down his controller, looking around.) God?

VOICE OF GOD Thou hast been chosen.

JULIUS What?

VOICE OF GOD Thou art the chosen one. I come onto you to tell you I have chosen you.

JULIUS For what?

VOICE OF GOD You are he.

JULIUS Who?

VOICE OF GOD He!

JULIUS Who?

VOICE OF GOD HE!

JULIUS Well what does that mean?

VOICE OF GOD Don’t ask questions. Have faith.

JULIUS In what?

VOICE OF GOD In me.

JULIUS Well, OK, but you got to give me a little more information. God! (silence) Hey, God! (no answer) God! God! GOD!!

(JULIUS stares of into space for a minute and then picks up his controller and continues to play his game.)

--------

(Exit ELLIE. JULIUS goes back to playing his game.)

VOICE OF GOD Julius!

JULIUS Oh, Shit! You scared me.

VOICE OF GOD Julius!

JULIUS God?

VOICE OF GOD It is I.

JULIUS God, when you said I was the chosen one, what does that mean exactly? Like I’m the most special? Like the most special on the Earth? Is that a fair assessment?

VOICE OF GOD Let me tell you a story.

JULIUS OK.

VOICE OF GOD Once there was a lonely sheep herder who lived in the mountains.

JULIUS What was his name?

VOICE OF GOD It’s not important. This sheep herder herded the sheep by day and by night looked up at the stars and wished for something more. One night I sent an angel down to talk to this sheep herder.

JULIUS Why didn’t you go talk to him yourself?

VOICE OF GOD Stop interrupting. The angel said unto him, “Sheep herder, you will be given a test by God. You will be asked to do something and you must do it without questioning or thinking for yourself. You must prove your love of God and your faith in Him.” The sheep herder wanted to know what he would be asked to do but the angel would say no more and flew away.

(Pause)

JULIUS Is that the whole story?

VOICE OF GOD Now Julius, the time has come for you, the chosen one. I give unto you a blessed task to prove you are worthy and to show your love for me and for the universe I created.

JULIUS Oh. Well, I dunno. I’m kind of busy right now what with the job search and all and I really had to pick up slack here helping my dad out since my mother died.

VOICE OF GOD Julius, don’t bullshit God.

JULIUS Sorry. Do I have the option to say no to your request?

VOICE OF GOD Do you not know that I am your Lord God and that saying no to me might be a very bad idea?

JULIUS All right. (He sighs.) What do you want me to do?

VOICE OF GOD Kill Santa.

JULIUS Wait, what? (Beat) What did you just say? (Beat) God! Hey, God, come back here. (Pause) Why do you keep doing that?

What I didn't expect

was that there would be so much stress associated with getting some shows up finally. Nerve is without a doubt a success. It's going really well and its almost over and it's freaking me out just a little that it's going so well. i'm so used to the rejection that so many people telling me they like it is kind of confusing and i had no idea that would be the case. Not that everyone liked it. (I've read some reviews now) But most people did seem to really enjoy the play. Which makes me feel great and yet I'm sure i have sent it to probably a hundred theatres which either rejected it or never responded. And i don't understand that.

But I have no time to try and figure that out because now there is all this stress about getting people in for Food For Fish. (opens the 6th. buy your tickets now) And the thousands of other things that have to happen to make it all come together in time. I'm scattered. It's been really hard to rehearse something while something else is going up.

Not to mention that I wish I could leave for a few days and see how Pretty Theft is going in DC. I'm not going to get there until right before it goes up. which means I have to leave in the middle of the Food For Fish run.

Not that I'm complaining. I'm thrilled to have all these productions. It's just sort of disorienting. there are a lot of plays on my shelf. a lot. i hope this burst of shows will lead to some more of them getting done though I'm not sure it works that way exactly. You might have to get a pulitzer before that happens. Although I'm not sure that even a pulitzer will ever make it possible to quit the day job, will it? i wonder what makes that possible.

Mike Boehm Suzan-Lori Parks offers a play a day

http://www.calendarlive.com/stage/cl-et-quick30.2jun30,0,7782431.story?coll=cl-stage-features

Oprah may know how to get the whole country reading the same book, but Pulitzer Prize-winner Suzan-Lori Parks has come up with a way to get it performing the same plays, week after week, for an entire year.

From Nov. 13, 2002, to Nov. 12, 2003, Parks wrote a short play each day. Now comes "365 days/365 plays," conceived and produced by Parks and Bonnie Metzgar. Billed as the largest theatrical collaboration in U.S. history, hundreds of theater companies around the nation will team to make sure that each play is staged on its fourth birthday — or at least during its birthday week — starting Nov. 13, 2006.

From the NY Times--Guantanamo

http://www.nytimes.com/2006/06/29/washington/29cnd-scotus.html?pagewanted=2&ei=5087%0A&en=016f4299710789ee&ex=1151812800

In the courtroom on Thursday morning, the chief justice sat silently in his center chair as Justice Stevens, sitting to his immediate right as the senior associate justice, read from the majority opinion. It made for a striking tableau on the final day of the first term of the Roberts court: the young chief justice, observing his work of just a year earlier taken apart point by point by the tenacious 86-year-old Justice Stevens, winner of a Bronze Star for his service as a Navy officer during World War II.

Nerve closes on the 1st. Food For Fish opens on the 6th.

Pretty Theft in DC