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1100 Playwright Interviews

1100 Playwright Interviews A Sean Abley Rob Ackerman E.E. Adams Johnna Adams Liz Duffy Adams Tony Adams David Adjmi Keith Josef Adkins Nicc...

Stageplays.com

Oct 27, 2005

Fake article from my friend Larry, guest blogger

ELTON JOHN TO RE-RECORD 'CANDLE IN THE WIND' IN HONOR OF NOT-FAMOUS DEAD WOMAN -Steve Klapman, 42, was unsure of what music to use for his late wife's memorial service until he learned that Elton John already had his demo in the mail. "I was too upset to think what she'd have wanted,"Klapman, an IT Provider, told reporters earlier today,"But then my friend Todd brought a tape of Elton John singing about her, and so now I guess I don't have to wonder any more. I'm still upset, though." The tape in question was a demo of Elton John's latest single, John's second remake of the popular dirge"Candle In The Wind," which was made possible through the thoughtfulness of a friend of the widower. "It's a good thing this bloke Todd came up with the idea for his mate Steve," phoned John from acrystal-sculpture-purchasing spree in Aspen, "I felt it was time. Time to to sing the world to tears again. Only no one famous had died lately." The tape was unofficially commissioned by Todd Gakk,who has worked closely with Klapman in several IT departents of several mid-level companies, after Gakk sent the idea to John to help Klapman with his loss. "Steve's a pretty ugly guy, like me," Gakk, dressed in a "No Fat Chicks!" t-shirt, said during a lunch breakat his office, "and ugly guys usually don't have a lot of friends, it's a scientific fact. Steve's my only friend, and the only one I know who's ever had a girl, so I couldn't let this whole memorial thing go by without getting Elton John involved. If his chick were here, she'd probably dig that. Steve's chick. Not Elton's. Steve's chick's the one who died. At least according to Steve. Elton's pretty much a fag." Upon learning of Klapman's loss through a note from Gakk, the "Rocketman" wasted no time in composing - or re-composing - his original song. "I used to think if there were one bird I'd've liked to know, it were Marilyn, but I was just a kid," John waxed nostalgic upon his original inspiration, "and that got me to think, 'There's A Song In There,Guv'nor,' and then when Lady Di died, I thought, 'if Iwere just a kid, I wouldn't have known her, either, just like with Marilyn.' And with this other bird, I mean, unless I'd have paid her to clean me house or somefing, I'd have never known her at all, which I didn't. It makes you think." "Yankee Lass," John's remake of "English Rose," a remake of "Candle in The Wind," speaks of saying goodbye to a young woman who will go down in history as not having a role in history." Well it seems to me you lived your life like a Yankee Lass who wasn't famous Always working in an office married to a guy from Tech And I would have liked to've known you but I'm too rich to work Your Yankee Lass-ness faded far too soon in this world filled with Mets fans The memorial service, planned for this evening, faced two obstacles. The first was Klappman's ambivalence. "I guess I thought it was cool when Elton was writing about famous dead chicks," the widower confessed, "but Stacey didn't have much of a following. She just answered the phones. Plus before she was all mine. And now she's the world's. I guess I know how Arthur Miller feels. Or felt." The second complication arose when a court order the service, attended by Klapman and Gakk, to cease and desist. The court order was written in the name of Stacey Klappman. "First of all, Steve and I are not married," Ms. Klappman, who is also not dead, informed well-wishers,"we just have the same last name. But we had the same last name before we met. Second, we never even went out. I just smiled at him in the elevator once. And third, I'm not dead. I just changed jobs." "Well she's dead to me," an embarrassed Mr. Klapman replied to the announcement, "and mourning's not forthe dead or the claimed-to-be-dead, it's for the living. Or the living who's doing the dead-claiming." "This figures," Mr. Gakk replied, "Steve's always doing stuff like this. He's a douche." Ms. Klappman's legal intervention has stopped the service, but the orders do not extend to Mr. John's use of the song." I actually think the song's kind of awesome," Ms. Klappman told VH1, " and I'm hoping they'll put old footage of me in the video with Nat King Cole." And so the song still resonates, with both the living, and the assumed dead.

Oct 24, 2005

the evil of submission fees

There has been a discussion on the big cheap list about the practice of charging playwrights to read their scripts, something I regularly rail against. Not only do I find it unethical but…well Jason says it best below. Jason Grote on submission fees: Well, I can say that there was a time in my life when I literally had to choose between play submission fees and rent, or feeding myself, sothere are cases when it does happen. Today, I can afford the fees, but I usually don't pay them (with the exception of Sundance, the O'Neill, and the occasional screenplay contest). My decision is not entirely based on principle, butbecause, in my experience, the theaters charging the fees usually suck. Based mostly on having seen their work, reading their mission statements and other items on their websites, or on occasion having read the winning plays in their contests, I feel comfortable saying that a reader's fee is almost always a sign of unprofessionalism. When I think of all the financially strapped small theater groups I know who do quality work, none of them charge submission fees. It might take them a year to get to your script, but that's the way it goes... Footnote(Since posting this on the Big Cheap list, I have since discovered that Moving Arts, a small company that I have heard good things about, charges fees for their one-act contest. I guess they're the exception that makes the rule.)

Women and Men

I am looking for quotations about men and women… and how they see one another. For example A woman needs a man like a fish needs a bicycle. And Do you not know I am a woman? When I think I must speak. Etc. Anyone have any good ones? It’s for a play I’m writing.

Oct 21, 2005

l

Hey everyone who reads my blog! Hey! Are you listening? My friend, Larry Kunofsky, new york playwright extroadinarie wrote a tremendously good 10 minute play. Who wants to produce it? I will not get an agent's fee for each production, but I will get me some articles for you dear blog readers. See below --- Larry Kunofsky wrote: > > > > > maybe if you tell people on your blog that i wrote > a > > really good ten minute play, people will come > after > > me > > and produce it. > > > > then i'll be a regular guest-blogger for you. > > > > oh, the essays I will give you! > > l

Oct 18, 2005

Thanksgiving Play

Come on, people! This thanksgiving play is not going to buy itself. So far we're looking at shows in Chicago, IL and Graysville, IN this year. That is if the kids can learn their lines. I've got confidence in them. But still, that's only two schools. And I'm sure there are a few illegal showings as well, but still. People need to learn about Thanksgiving. From my play. Don't you think your elementary school should do this play too? Remember, kids who love theatre become adults who love theatre. And kids who love turkey...well I don't know about that. I'm allergic, myself.

Oct 17, 2005

Also

There was (I hear) a homecoming rally at Juilliard. What sort of game do they have at Juilliard, you may ask? Why dodgeball of course! I missed the event but below is the email I received. Don't ask me what Guilliard is because I don't know. Reminder! Juilliard’s First Homecoming Game is this Saturday (tomorrow) on the Plaza! Don’t let the rain discourage you. All weather reports state that it will stop by noon. 6pm Tailgating 7pm Pep Rally 7:30pm Dodgeball begins Come witness Juilliard BEAT Guilliard!
So last week I helped oraginze this event at Columbia--screening of Good Night and Good Luck which was written by George Clooney and Grant Heslov and directed by Clooney. I was quite impressed with the film. There was a panel discussion afterwards and I was surprised how smart, funny and charismatic Clooney was. The film was obviously a labor of love. link to interview with clooney and heslov. K and I were talking about it after--in theatre you forget that there are other groups of people who are concerned about other things that aren't theatre. All over the city (and the world) are passionate intelligent people interested in say journalism or sculpture or architecture and have interesting and illuminating things to say about such things. Normally I just hear the people who are speaking about theatre. I hear a little bit about Journalism for my job and have become more interested in where Journalism is headed since working here and I know K talks a lot and reads a lot about educational theory, but mostly I read and talk to people constantly about writing theatre about what it is to be a theatre person (poor and underappreciated usually) and how theatre should best be made. Anyway I got off the topic which was that Good Night & Good Luck was inspirational. The thing I came away with most is the idea that both Murrow and McCarthy were each other's downfall. The reward for rocking the boat is sometimes that you don't get your mainstream audience. And sometimes someone makes a film about you. Either way I wanted to be murrow--the guy who was saying--no this is not right and we should do something about it despite this pressure. The press is feeling this pressure right now in perhaps a more subtle and insidious way. --- I was thrilled to see, Pete and Carolyn, although only briefly, as they made their NY tour. Had a few beers and a lot of Chinese food. Good to see you two.

Oct 12, 2005

I am currently in a state of limbo--not working on a show--overworked at work, have finished a draft of a new play which will neeed revising and want to start a new play but don't know enough about it yet to start writing. I was very sick yesterday and slept most of the day. I wish I could go back to the good-old columbia days when I was writing all the time and was only working part time. of course part of the reason I have to work full time now is the incredible debt I've managed to accumulate. I wish it would stop raining.

Oct 7, 2005

Quote I've been looking for

Thanks to Dorothy for this "There is a vitality, a life force, a quickening that is translated through you into action, and because there is only one of you in all time, this expression is unique. If you block it, it will never exist through any other medium and be lost. The world will not have it. It is not yours to determine how good it is; nor how it compares with other expressions. It is your business to keep the channel open. You do not even have to believe in yourself or your work. You have to keep open and aware directly to the urges that motivate you. Keep the channel open. No artist is ever pleased. There is no satisfaction whatever at any time. There is only a queer divine dissatisfaction; a blessed unrest that keeps us marching and makes us more alive than the others." --Martha Graham to Agnes De Mille
I got nothing to say at the moment. But won't you read my plays?

Oct 5, 2005

Howdy

This morning I put the finishing touches on my first draft of the new play, and yes, just as I suspected, I am a bit depressed. It looks as though my play Nerve is going to be done in Dallas, TX this March. Now I’m going to start writing a large cast cowboy play. Everyone loves a large cast cowboy play, right?

Oct 3, 2005

Postpartum

I'm trying to understand why when I finish a play I don't really feel a sense of elation but instead always feel a little depressed. Maybe it's because the possibilities are over--it still doesn't have the potential to be everything because now it's something and people can start judging it. Maybe it's because I'm leaving that world of the play behind and for a while, especially if it was going well, it was a place I could be in. It was fun. It was colorful and thrilled me in a way real life rarely does. And now that's over and there are fewer discoveries to make--(for me anyway)--ideally it will have a life and someone else will be making discoveries soon in a theatre or in a room not in my head. I'm at that place now where I'm finishing something and haven't started something else. It's a sad place sometimes. Maybe it's also because every finished piece is a kind of failure. There are things of course that I was unable to do. There are things I hoped my subconscious would create that I wouldn't know about and sometimes that happens but it's never as brilliant as I had hoped possible. Also I came into this playwriting thing at the age of 18 or so and I saw it as a way to understand the world. I thought if I studied Waiting for Godot and began to write I would discover the truth about the world and about the existence or non-existence of God. I thought I would understand how to live correctly. It's trite, I know but I was looking for the meaning of life. And part of me is a little disappointed each time I finish a play and I haven't been able to learn the secrets of the universe. At the same time I don't think I'm just writing stories. Not that there is anything wrong with a good story but I honestly think I'm trying to illuminate something--to figure out something about people. To make the world better. To help somehow--to uphold truth--to touch people emotionally--make them laugh, sure. Laugh as much as possible. To skewer with satire, sure although I don't know that satire is a tool of change--it may just be a tool of wit. I dunno. Am I getting anywhere at all? Is this a pointless pursuit. Who can say really? All I know is that as soon as possible I'm going to dive into writing something else so I don't have to think about how pointless the writing is or how more pointless and often fruitless the post creation work can be.

Oct 1, 2005

Call me Nomad

IT is like this. I am very close to finishing this play. so close I can see it but then maybe I have to fill in another 5 to 10 pages here and there. I will bring it to class, I will bring it to my writer's group. But I must finish it--today perhaps tomorrow perhaps monday but I must do it soon and maybe I should stop bloggin and get to it. I've got this flashdrive which allows me to be the computer nomad I am--hopping from Columbia computer to Juilliard dorm computer to my own computer no matter what is apple and what PC. They all answer to that which is the flashdrive. If you are a nomad like me, I reccomend them. It's like a disk. Right now I am in a small computer room in a Juilliard dorm with a bunch of 17 year olds who are all prodigys at something I'm sure. I went to some Prelude fest and will attend more later. And then the party where Sheila and Soph will play music apparently. I love parties with music and theatre people and alcohol. I hope alcohol. Hmm...I semm to still be posting and not writing this play. Damn you highspeed free internet! Damn you!